Living within a society with different cultural background and religious practice is an opportunity for us to understand, share and appreciate our practice better.
Last Friday was Cheng Beng Day, the day for children, grandchildren and relatives to visit, clean and pray at the tomb of their late parents or relatives. I still prefers to use the Hokkien term Cheng Beng, a term which I has been accustomed to since I lost my father when I was five.
This year the whole lot of my siblings families and my family visited our parents tombs this weekend to pay our respects. This is the first Cheng Beng for my late mother who pass away last year.
Two pertinent comments were raised by my eldest boy during this Cheng Beng season which I took as an opportunity to advised on the importance of respect to the elders and family ties.
The question or comment he raised with me when I told him about our plans to visit and pray at the graves of Ah Kong (grandfather) and Ah Mah (grandmother) was that some of his Christian friends will not be visiting their grandparents grave. I told him that no matter which faith we adhered to, we need to respect our elders and our ancestors as this is not determined by our religion but our practice of fillial piety which is an important culture and traditions for people of Chinese descent. The practice of fillial piety is also an important teachings in Buddhism.
Another observation my boy notice is that my other siblings still practice the usual Chinese traditional and folk practice of offering and burning of joss papers and other Cheng Beng accessories. I am sure he raised this because my children has been taught the difference between Chinese traditional folk practice and the teachings of the Buddha. We do not burn those joss papers at home and the local Buddhist temple that my family congregated adhered to the Buddhist approach to devotion.
He must be curious why we participated in those offerings when we are together with my siblings families?
I explained to him that we need to respect other people beliefs and traditions. Furthermore what is important the relationship among our relatives are intact and stay together. It is not wise to push our beliefs upon others and causes friction and breakdown in the family. As long as we understand and be strong with our Buddhist teachings, these Chinese traditional practices will not undermined our faith and practice as Buddhists.
To be a Buddhist did not mean we have to severe ties with others of different faith or traditions. In contrary it should be taken as a responsibility and opportunity to share the Teachings of the Buddha.
